Germaine Greer once coined a phrase to describe the erotic qualities of the stiletto – ‘F*** me shoes’. I would like to hear her description of these passion killing rubber clogs.

My counterpart on Yachting World, Elaine Bunting, has already brought the hideous Croc to our attention.

But, try these for size (or rather don’t), we now have the Deck Croc.

Guaranteed to keep every skipper’s eye on the course to be steered.